The intention may be to strengthen one’s ethnic identity and perpetuate the culture yet this can often undermine relationships. More specifically, I should say inter-ethnic dating such as two Asians dating from different Asian ethnic backgrounds.My heart breaks when I hear how racist Asian parents can get.One client struggles mightily since her parents are vehemently against her dating outside her culture.
Parents talk about America being the land of opportunity and dreams but when it comes to freedom for their children to choose their spouses, they want to control them like a Communist regime.
My example today is just the tip of the iceberg as I haven’t even broached the even more taboo subject of Asians dating Black (where parents get even more racist). I think part of the reason is their “ethnic dream” or desire to have children marry like-minded partners so they can talk to them in their native language (if they’re immigrants).
Another aspect is some sense of common ground being of the same culture.
Yet the damage incurred by imposing these beliefs can be irreparable.
I’ve heard stories where some families have renounced even calling them their sons or daughters for dating outside their race.
It seems crazy and extreme (and it is) but that’s the world we still live in where race is used to tear and divide people apart as opposed to building mutual respect and interest.Portraits of a Village: 1950-70 Westwood 568 Broadway, at Prince Street, So Ho Through May 12 Among the benefits of multiculturalism was an expanded field for photography.As it stands, her boyfriend is Vietnamese and her parents tell her if they get married their kids will end up with birth defects because of her choice.To make matters worse, her father recently made an ultimatum that she must either choose her boyfriend or her relationship with him.Since she doesn’t want to give up this relationship, her father has ostracized her and will not talk to her and doesn’t want her coming to their house if she’s still dating him.I get incensed when these stories walk through my door.